Heart in art

I can still vividly remember my mother telling me that she found a dance teacher available on Facebook. The requirements were simple: a notebook, kurti and dupatta. Starting with a simple thattu adavu, I look back today at my 12-year-old self, learning the beats and speed ever so slowly. Five years and a bit later, this journey to discovering Bharatanatyam is something I never thought would be so close to my heart. There is not a rigid routine that I have followed in the years of dancing. It begins with a simple warm-up exercise, basic adavus and then progresses into dance pieces. There is a lot of flexibility when it comes to practicing Bharatanatyam and it is the dancer’s goal for that practice session(s) which determines the pieces and steps that are practised. For me, improving the stability of my legs is a major goal that I have been focusing on. Theermanam adavu and kutthitha mettadavu have regularly been included to ensure that my focus is on the legs and their movement.

Regarding support from family, it is my mother who has been a major supporter and well-wisher for me in my dance journey. From enrolling me in my very first dance class to finding a tailor to stitch costumes, she has taken all the responsibility to ensure that dance remains my focus and coming this far has only happened because she continues to support me in every endeavor of mine. Her determination to ensure that I am grounded in and understand the culture I have come from is what has led me to develop a special bond with Bharatanatyam.

I have come to view Bharatanatyam not only as a form of dance but as a connection to my roots. Growing up in a western environment, there are few opportunities to understand heritage and culture. I am fortunate to be able to have this connection to my culture and this art form has provided me with the opportunity to do so. It may feel alienating at first, feeling like it is too far of a connection to have in a country that is in another part of the world. But overcoming those feelings is the first step to understanding the art form for what it is and then making a place for it in your heart.

Going into my final year of school, it is difficult, and I am nervous about finding the balance between things I love and things I must let go. Dance is the way I compartmentalize and unwind myself from the daily stresses of academics. It transcends my expectations of perfection and gives me purpose that is vastly different to what anything else gives me. There are days in which I do feel no motivation or simply too tired to get up. Those days are also replaced by days in which I feel accomplished after performing an entire piece without a break. In the end, I have learned, when there is a persistent voice telling you the thing that is in your heart, you simply follow it and the rest will fall right into place, and for me that place is the cluttered garage where I practice this beautiful art form.